"If you loved her you'd have her sectioned"

The title of this post are actual words said to my boyfriend a couple of weeks ago and they got me thinking. When I first heard them I was stunned. I felt like everything I’d be fighting through had been for nothing and people still saw me as the hopeless, depressed girl who showed up sometimes. But then I realised just why they had such an impact – because I knew I was better than that.


Anyone who knows me knows that university has been the toughest three years of my life and at times I thought I’d never make it through. I felt alone, trapped and at times suicidal, but by the end of this week I will have finished my undergrad and for the first time in a while I’m fucking proud of myself.

I’m nowhere near perfect, exams are stressing me out and I end up in tears far more than I should, but I still feel in control. There’s still a voice in the back of my head that tells me I’m not good enough, that I’m going to fail my degree, but I can see just how irrational that is now. I’m already planning my masters year, deep down I know I’m going to be just fine.
Not three months ago I couldn’t see tomorrow and here I am planning a whole year. I’m already working on the student paper and have thrown myself into the darts society and I’m not stopping there. I’m determined to be known as something more than the quiet girl with a head full of problems.

I know this post has been all about me, but what made me stop wallowing about that passing comment and actually write something was other people. I’ve seen a lot of people on social media struggling recently and believe me when I say I know exactly how that feels. If I can wake up this morning and still have a little dance in the bathroom after years of feeling like I might not see tomorrow then I promise you can make it through the shit you find yourself in.

Surround yourself with people who ask how you’re doing, I know that they care about you. And if the little voice won’t go away then just imagine that it’s Donald Trump speaking to you (I wish I could take credit for that idea).

Above all else, look after yourself because you’re always worth it. x