Being honest about my health

Recently I’ve been incredibly ill. I’ve been missing my lectures at university and pulling out of plans with friends. I’ve spent a ridiculous amount of time in tears, whether that’s lying in bed trying to figure out what the point of getting up is, or curled up on the floor after deciding it’s all too much. When I haven’t been crying, I’ve been drowning in suicidal thoughts or harming myself, with the familiar sense of emptiness sweeping over me.

That’s what I wish I could tell people face to face. 

Recipe: Wiener Schnitzel

One thing I wish I had when I was a fresher was a nice stack of cheap, student-friendly recipes. I spent day after day eating omelettes or cheese on toast and I quickly grew sick of them. So, I thought I would try my hand at some easy to follow recipes with all the important information you'd need (like cost).

New beginnings

It’s safe to say that this blog has been abandoned for a long time and it’s largely because I created a niche blog about a topic that I’m hugely passionate about, but rarely knew what to discuss. With that said, I’ve decided to take the blog in a new, much more personal direction.

"If you loved her you'd have her sectioned"

The title of this post are actual words said to my boyfriend a couple of weeks ago and they got me thinking. When I first heard them I was stunned. I felt like everything I’d be fighting through had been for nothing and people still saw me as the hopeless, depressed girl who showed up sometimes. But then I realised just why they had such an impact – because I knew I was better than that.

My Hamster, My Hero: The Mental Health Benefits of Pets

Wow, it’s been a long time since I’ve written anything, I’m sorry! I’ve been dealing with numerous problems that just keep cropping up and haven’t found much to write about, but something has come up recently that has really bothered me. I’m currently in the midst of ‘wranglings’ with my university surrounding my mental health. I’ve spoken to countless people about how I don’t feel comfortable in my room on campus and how I’m struggling to find reasons to stay and finish my degree. The majority of people suggested that I get a small pet for my room to help me feel more at home. Of course me being a little goody-two-shoes decided to ask my college instead of just buying one and sneaking it into halls like the rest of students do. Despite being polite and offering explanations as to why it would help me, I’ve been shot down every time. The reason? If I have a pet, then everyone else will want one. Instead of giving up, I thought that I would come back to my blog to explain just how beneficial pets can be for those suffering with depression and anxiety.

Would younger Sian be proud of me?

When I was younger, I had a lot of demands about my future, as little kids often do. I had everything mapped out in front of people that would contribute to my perfect life and I was determined to do them. Of course, over the years, these things change – I no longer want to be a fairy for example (well I do, I just know that it’s never going to happen). However, I thought that instead of focusing on all the negatives that I’m trying to stamp out, I would instead compare my current self to my childhood dreams and see just how well I’ve done and where I have yet to improve. It’s easy to focus on what needs to happen in the future, but also important to reflect and what you wished for in the past.

World Mental Health Day - Dignity

Today is World Mental Health Day, run by the World Federation for Mental Health. Since 1992, the annual event has aimed to raise awareness about mental health around the world. Of course, I do nothing but prattle on about mental health, so a special day for raising awareness isn’t something I’d usually consider (why not all 365?), but this year the theme is dignity, which isn’t something I’ve spoken about much.